She Loved Me Through It All: How Her Love Helped Me Accept Myself

 

There was a time, not so many years ago, when I hid from myself.

Back then, my incontinence felt like a shameful secret, a silent struggle I carried alone. It started after my accident in the military—sudden, permanent, and completely out of my control. I felt broken. Less than. I tried everything to avoid the reality of it: staying home, skipping events, even risking embarrassing moments just to feel “normal” again. I was wearing adult diapers, but I couldn’t bear to look at myself in the mirror. It felt like I had lost not just control, but my dignity too.

But she never saw me that way.

My wife never once turned away. She never flinched or made me feel like I was too much, or not enough. Instead, she simply… loved me. Unconditionally.

I still remember the first time I cried in her arms over it. I had soaked through everything. I was humiliated, angry at myself, and trying to apologize. She just held me tighter, stroked my hair, and said softly, “Baby Cakes, you don’t have to be sorry for something you can’t control. You don’t have to hide from me. I’m right here.”

That moment cracked something open in me.

Over time, her steady love became the soil where my acceptance could grow. She didn’t just tolerate my needs—she embraced them. She helped me find diapers that fit better, that felt more comfortable, even ones that made me smile a little with cute prints and soft pastel colors. She encouraged me to stop hiding, to go out again, to live fully as I am.

And maybe the most healing moments of all? Were the tender, simple acts of care. Her hand gently guiding me to a family restroom when I was soaked. The way she’d pull a fresh diaper and wipes from her tote bag without missing a beat. How she’d hum softly while helping clean me up, like it was the most natural and loving thing in the world. No judgment. No pity. Just love.

We made a kind of ritual out of it—soft towel laid out, plastic pants folded neatly, her gentle words calming my anxious heart. It wasn’t just a diaper change. It was love in action. A reminder that I am worthy of care, of comfort, of affection exactly as I am.

She doesn’t see my incontinence as a problem to fix. She sees me—and she loves me. Fully. Unapologetically.

And through her eyes, I learned to love myself again, too.

Tags: #AliceInYogaPants, #DiaperedYoga, #VisibleHealing, #SoftnessIsStrength, #SelfAcceptance, #ToteBagDiaries, #SupportSunday, #CrinkleAndFlow, #PelvicFloorHealing, #OutfitDiary